November 17, 2011
Fist Bump Into Each Other

People are always talking about how they “bumped into each other,” but there’s never any bumping. Unless they’re talking about the fist bumping they did when they saw each other. And if that’s the case, it’s like, whoa get a life, you know?

Fist bumping sucks unless you’re the one who initiates it.¬†Whenever someone tries to fist bump me I just sort of stare at their hand and for a second I think they’re going to give me a treat so I hold out my hand like “Hell yeah, I hope you have some fucking candy in that fist.” But then they don’t and instead they just fist bump the air like a tool and leave me feeling sad and hungry for candy.¬†

Bottom line: White people shouldn’t be allowed to fist bump. They should just stick to “bumping into each other.”

  1. quinnk posted this
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